The Circle of Life

I've been an emotional roller coaster for the past 48 hours!  Monday was my dad's 72nd birthday.  My dad suffered from a stroke about 17 years ago.  Since then he has had numerous mini strokes.  Over the years he has gotten progressively worse and has lost his ability to do anything on his own.  In the last year he has totally lost the light that would shine from him whenever you'd see him.  My dad is one of the best people I've ever known.  I honestly feel like the luckiest girl in the world to have this man as MY daddy.  On Monday afternoon I called my mom in Arizona to ask if I could talk to my dad to wish him a happy birthday.  She informed me that he wasn't feeling too well and that he has become a bit more unresponsive these days.  My heart breaks being so far away.  I am thankful that I was able to spend some time with him this summer but it still hurts not being there now.  Later that night my aunt who also lives in Arizona called to tell me how bad my dad has been looking.  She mentioned that she really feels him letting go and that she doesn't think he will be with us much longer.  This brings on mixed feeling for me.  I will miss my dad more than anything when he passes but on the other hand I do not want to see my father suffer any more than he already has.  He's so miserable. He's just not 'there' anymore.  My heart also breaks for my mother.  My poor mother has been taking care of my father for all of these years and she is so tired.  She has one of the hardest jobs imaginable!  She deserves to be able whatever years she has left.  I dread the day I get the call but I am doing my best to prepare myself.

In other news,  I am an auntie again!  That's twice in 30 days!  My brother, Dan, and his wife, Heather, welcomed a beautiful baby girl the day after my dad's birthday!  I guess every year on their birthdays we will be reminded of how precious and short life is and to embrace and enjoy every minute of it.  

Alyssa Taylor Medina