The last few weeks have been extremely stressful for me. The girls have been a bit more out of sync with one another than usual and they have really been exceeding my limit on their new favorite word, "No". The dog is like a giant bowling ball and my kids seem to be the pins. Every 10 minutes he will run at full speed straight into one of them sending her flying across the room. The toy box in the playroom has been turned upside down more times than I have liked and it has been a struggle getting them to clean up after themselves. Riley, my 19 month old, seems to want to nurse more than ever these days and it's making absolutely crazy. Maybe it has all been in my head but lately I just feel more on the verge of a major breakdown than ever.
Sometimes it seems like all the other moms have everything so under control and I am running around like a chicken with it's head cut off. I have been a lot more snippy with my children and my husband but no matter what the cause they still do not deserve to spoken to in such ways. I haven't been getting much sleep and I find myself a lot crankier than usual. My eating habits have gotten out of control, as well. I will munch on anything I can find, usually carbs, and not eat a full healthy meal until dinner time. I worry so much about taking care of everyone else that I haven't been taking care of myself.
After having a bit of a meltdown a few days ago when Bella wouldn't go to bed after five attempts and it reaching 11 pm, I went to lay in bed with Riley to nurse her back to sleep (thanks to Bella). I opened Facebook and saw I had a new "Like" from Elizabeth at The Hesitant Housewife. I went to her blog to follow her and saw a post she recently wrote titled "Jesus Talked to Me in the Shower". I honestly felt like I was meant to read that post. It hit so close to home that I just broke down in tears.
As moms we have so many things and people depending on us that it's easy to lose sight of ourselves and our own well-being. We also forget that we can ask for help. We can ask for help from our families but more importantly we can pray and ask for help because He is just waiting for us to ask. I was so wrapped up in feeling sorry for myself that I started to disrespect myself and my family. I knew I needed to change things fast.
That night I went to bed begging the Lord to please give me the strength I need to get through these crazy toddler years and asked that the next day not be so difficult. I cried and told Him I needed a break from the madness. The next day everything was wonderful. The kids woke up and quietly watched TV in our bed for an extra hour while I took care of the dog and drank my coffee. They came down, ate breakfast and played for a bit while I ran on the treadmill. I took shower...Yes, a Shower!!! I was even able to wash my hair!!! ha ha ha While I was blow drying my hair they took a bath in our tub (a treat for them). We all got dressed and then they went down for their naps without any problems. When they woke up we went to Chick-fil A and had a great time. We came home, prepared dinner and got ready for bed. I was even able to watch The Bachelor uninterrupted! A full two hours of Sean Lowe. I think my blood pressure is back at a normal level just because of yesterday. I kid you not, I thought I was going to have a stroke from all the stress I was feeling.
The point here is remember that He is always listening. He is waiting for you to ask for help. He will give you what you need and never give you more than you can really handle. We have to stop, breathe and remember to take care of ourselves too. We can not give 100% to those we care for if we do not take care of ourselves first.
I forgot to pray for another good day and before 9 am my beautiful new carpet was covered in crayons.